Conspiracy Theories as Selective Radical Skepticism

I tend to think about conspiracy theories in the context of epistemology. How do we know anything? How do I know the Titanic sank? Or that Finland exists? Or that germ theory is true? Or that the Declaration of Independence was adopted in 1776? What sources of information are reliable? How would I know?

Most conspiracy theories require that many trusted sources of information are compromised. Flat Earth conspiracy entails that NASA, and indeed every space agency everywhere, is lying to you. Vaccine conspiracy theorists require that the CDC and the WHO and every health agency in every nation on earth (many of whom are antagonistic to each other) are lying to you.

Now, there are very good reasons for believing that large-scale long-term conspiracies can’t happen, but that’s not critical to my argument here.

Instead, my point here is that if we decide that these institutions are being manipulated by some shadowy entity that coerces or manipulates them into deceiving us, then there is simply no good reason to trust any information from anyone who claims to tell us the truth on these matters.

Which is to say: I can have a degree of understanding for someone who says “I don’t know if Earth is round”, but I cannot at all understand how someone would say “I know Earth is flat.”

I can see, with some charity, how someone might believe “I don’t know if vaccines are safe.” But if that same person proclaims with confidence “Vaccines aren’t safe”, I am bewildered.

Any entity, the Illuminati or whatever, that has the power and resources to control NASA would absolutely have the power and resources to control Jimbo’s Flat Earth Truther channel on YouTube. We have no reasons to think that Jimbo would have a greater degree of moral heroism than the thousands of people who work at NASA. We have no reason to think he would be less susceptible to being bought off. Fundamentally, we have no reason to trust Jimbo over NASA, at a minimum.

I’m constantly seeing videos on TikTok or YouTube where the content creator has some lines to the effect of “This is what they don’t want you to know.” I am constantly being asked to believe that random channels on the internet are somehow poking their fingers into the eyes of the most evil and powerful people on the planet.

Well why aren’t they being black bagged? Why hasn’t Russel Brand fallen down some stairs yet? If the goddamn Illuminati can control the fucking WHO they sure as hell can control some crystal mommy healer on TikTok.

The effect reminds me of someone who began Descartes’s project of radical skepticism but stopped halfway. If you are unfamiliar, here’s the short version. Dude wanted the truth and thought that the best way to start would be engage in a thought experiment where he discarded every belief that he could be wrong about. He thought he was eating some cheese but he realized he could be dreaming or hallucinating (in modern terms we might say something about being a brain in a vat), so he could be wrong about the belief he was eating cheese so, for the purposes of the thought experiment he would assume that he was wrong about that belief he was eating cheese. And it got worse! To really strengthen the thought experiment he would assume that an incredibly powerful magical entity was deliberately trying to deceive him and manipulate him.

Now, that last bit parallels, in a more mild sense, the shadow organization that is manipulating the big organizations (you need that shadowy organization or entity because otherwise it wouldn’t make sense that every space agency in the world is on the same page about Earth being round.). It’s the powerful, albeit not quite magical (eh? I mean according to some conspiracy theorists….) entity dedicated to deceiving you.

AND YET, they selectively carve out cases where they assume said shadowy entity is somehow ignoring certain sources of information. Somehow RFK JR is immune to the Satanic Council. Somehow Joe goddamn Rogan is safe from the talons of the Blood Sorcerers of the Third Realm.

And so I have to conclude that conspiracy theorists are largely being inconsistent with their radical skepticism. They are overwhelmingly confident in certain beliefs that are derived from sources that they have no reason to think are more trustworthy than other sources of information they deride.

And many of their other beliefs are grounded in sources that would be just as suspect if they were consistent.

Does Finland exist, people of the US? Have you been there? Have you even met a Finnish person? If you did, how did you know they aren’t an actor? After all, if every astronaut is an actor, why couldn’t that person? Have you seen footage of Finland? Well, if the footage of the round Earth can be fake, so could that footage. I submit that if you don’t know that Earth is round, you don’t know that Finland exists. Even if you flew there, how would you know where your airplane landed? (Sorry Finnish folk for dragging you into this.)

Was the Declaration of Independence adopted in 1776? Is is 2024? Did the Titanic sank? And are the sources of information you use to determine that any more trustworthy than the sources that tell us that Earth is round? And are they any less trustworthy than Chakra Lady Sybil with her singing bowls that tells you that gout is caused by not drinking enough raw milk?

Why would anyone bother to lie about Finland being real? I dunno, why would anyone go the trouble of lying about Earth being being round? I’ve seen some folks try and claim that it’s some sort of anti-Christian plot to convince people the Bible is wrong or to try and trick humans into thinking they’re insignificant or something, but that makes no sense. Humans have known Earth is round since the Greek city-states. Christianity flourished and spread in the context of a world that knew Earth was round. Earth being round was never an inhibitor on the popularity of Christianity, and it would be ridiculous to expend the colossal resources necessary to pull of this con just to fuck with Christianity.

If you’re going to be some kind of Pyrrhic radical skeptic that doubts the CDC and NASA then all I ask is you be consistent and apply an equal level of doubt to literally every other source of information.